We sat at Gatwick watching the aeroplanes coming and going (we were on cloud 9 dreaming of the burning sun on an African beach in Kenya). The voice came over the tannoy for us to board the flight to take us on our dream holiday. We started to walk towards the boarding gate and to our surprise we got delayed for 20 mins(this might sound minor, and believe me it is compared to what im about to tell you about our holiday from hell)this is where it started to go wrong! We boarded the plane and it was the worst flight we had been on. I'm surprised the older people didn't pass out it was so cramped we couldn't believe it and other passengers were not happy either. We eventually got to Mombasa airport where we could only land at 6.30 as it got light because they haven't got the equipment to land in the dark. We left the plane and got our luggage, and then we got ripped off. We changed some money at the airport bureau de change as we were told the hotels were expensive. The cashier then gave us the money back £200 light (o.k it was our 1st time and we were a bit green to it but £200). We were then bundled on to these old nails to take us to the hotels.
On arrival to the Coral-Palm Beach Hotel Resort, it didn't look to bad, there were porters singing a welcoming song when we went in the entrance to the hotel. We checked in got our room key and went to the room. It looked o.k at first glance then a thing ran across the floor like a giant centipede (it was massive). I tried to kill it but it went in to the skirting board to quick. We went to reception to get a key for the safe to be told there wasn't one for that room. We were told that we would have to put all our money in the hotel safe. The hotel safe had a cashier there from 8.00am-1.00pm and then 5.00pm -8.00pm, but in-between we couldn't get our money. There was nothing we could do so we accepted the fact and went back to the room to relax after such a long and exhausting journey. My girlfriend sat on the bed and fell straight through it (we couldn't believe it). We went back to reception and complained. They moved us to room 624 on the 1st floor (which had a safe, with no lock at all) anyway we took the room. We went to the welcome meeting and had a greeting drink and met the rep (Catia). We thought we would have a shower and go for something to eat. That's when we discovered the shower water was salt water (yes they were pumping it directly from the sea) The second floor didn't even have water because since they had a fire at the hotel (there was only 2 fire extinguishers in the whole place) they replaced the gravity fed water system which obviously goes down hill, with a pumping system which goes up hill. When they turn the pumps up above 31psi to get water to the top floor the pipe work cant take the pressure and springs leaks on the other floors. The (swiss) manger Andreas who said" I don't like English people" also said" we are going to close the top floor when the peak season is over". We still smelt sweaty after showering because of the salt.
We also noticed that the hotels were allowing prostitutes from the local villages to come in and use the pool and rooms with dirty old men. We know they were prostitutes because one of the bar staff told one of our friends he could get him one if he wanted. It is actually advertised as a family holiday.
We went for breakfast and the muesli looked like it was alive, there were flies and wasps all over it. A woman peeled back the selafien on some fruit and flies came out. We were told the meat was beef and it was tongue. Hence we got food poisoned and spent two days in bed. We drank the water supplied to us from the hotel to find out later that it was bottled by African Safari Club, straight out the tap. We stopped drinking the water and became allot better. We had a night mingling with a few people and went to bed quite early as we were going to Wasini Island early the next morning. My girl friend walked down the steps from our room about 5.30am (where there were no lights on and I have got photos of the steps. One with the flash and one with out, it is pitch black) and lost her footing on the steps. She fell backwards hurting her back and whist reaching out to stop her self sustained multiple fractures to her left arm (it was broken). I sent a German friend of mine to get help. He came back saying the manager wanted to see it first but he wouldn't be there till 8.00am and the doctor would be there at 11.00am. I told my friend to stay with my girlfriend and I went to reception where all hell let loose and they phoned a taxi.
We then made the journey to Pandya hospital in Mombassa. When we arrived we were put in a dirty looking ward, where the cupboards were supposed to be white but were black. They came to give her an injection for the pain and it was so bad I had to go and watch the needle come from a clean packet. They then took 3 x-rays of her arm and told us it would be about £600 to do the operation. We didn't have £600 with us. I tried to explain that the insurance would sort out all the payments, but they said the insurance would take to long so they needed the money. They then told us that if the bones weren't set in 48 hours she would loose her hand due to infection. That really hit us hard! They bound her arm with a bandage and put it in a sling. So for 3 x-rays an injection and bounding her arm they charged us £200, and then I had to wait for the painkillers and got charged about another £30. Waiting for the painkillers took about 1 and a half hours and I was dehydrated, mean while my girlfriend was still in the back of a taxi with a broken arm and also dehydrated. I couldn't get a drink from anywhere for us, I was lucky that I found a nurse who got 2 glasses of water for us (I was very grateful). We then took the taxi back to the hotel, where I took my girlfriend to the room and started to make phone calls to England for help, because we weren't getting any from African Safari Club.
I had dropped my mobile phone in the pool and had no numbers the insurance number I had written down in a little book I had with me. When I got in touch with bookable holidays I gave them a ref number to open the case and they rang me back saying they had no recollection of us. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I felt helpless we only had 48 hours to get her arm fixed. I needed help from England the only number I could remember was my mothers. I phoned and asked her to get in touch with my sister, as she is a banker and would know a quick way, if any to get the money in to my bank. My sister helped us allot, I made 5 phone calls from the hotel and it cost us another £100. Eventually my sister came through and got the money so we could get it out of the wall. We were all set to go back to Pandya (which we didn't want to do and we were frightened). Luckily out of the blue a phone call came for us and when we got to it, it was James Night from the British Consulate. He had heard what had happened via axa insurance and got his doctor Dr Muhammed to speak to Dr Sheth at Pandya. Dr Muhammed told James Night to get us there straight away. James Night then sent a taxi to pick us up and take us to Mombasa Hospital in a Private wing where the care was excellent. We were there for 30 minutes and they took her to theatre and she was back in 40 minutes. We stayed there for 2 days, before having to return to the hotel for the last few days of our holiday.
Our day of departure finally came around and we sat at the airport thinking of England and Tony Blair. We boarded the plane and sat down. We couldn't wait for the plane to land in England. Only to be told we were going to have to turn around and land at Mombassa. My girlfriend suddenly looked at me and said "That's not cloud is it ".I replied "No it's not, it's smoke!" we were on fire. We circled round still quite low, it looked about 300ft when we started to turn then we climbed a bit higher. There was only power from one engine though and we were going really slowly. They say it was a bird strike but the prop was pointing out wards not in wards. As we came into land still full of fuel, we looked out of the window to see 7 fire engines an air ambulance with lights flashing and crowds of people lining the runway, just watching us come in. We thought that was it, we had visions of just hitting the runway and bursting into flames it was horrible. Thank God we touched down and lived. My girlfriend said what a pilot. Then we disembarked and had our passports confiscated. We waited about 1 hour for some transport to come and pick us up and take us back to the hotel we thought we had escaped. The transport turned up and again we couldn't believe it, it looked like a giant lilt van. It performed like one to; we were going up a duel carriageway on a hill like the side of Kilimanjaro when the clutch went on the old girl. Next thing the driver was trying to bump start it in reverse with 38 ton artics running at the hill up our a**es and on the hooters. We managed to crawl up the hill eventually (in a place where you just don't want to be stopping. EVER!)And got back to the hotel from hell. We were told it would only be a day delay at the most while we waited for the part to be fitted on the plane. Three days later we left having had arguments with arrogant managers about us paying extra money for drinks. We didn't like the attitude of the manager when asked if the children could have sodas he said no some kids like beer( it was a joke a proper Mickey mouse firm) We have even got video footage on our last night of mortar bomb and machine gun fire in the distance from our friends balcony, and news papers (obtained from the hospital because you couldn't get them from the hotel or local villages)with articles about village raids at dawn where ,the villagers went to pray and in the morning at 5.30am, armed gun men came from Somalia (Mogadishu)and shot dead 8 men and 20 women and children. One 23 year old lady had her breast hacked off , and a 70 year old lady sustained multiple gun shot wounds to her stomach and lost 7 children.......
Since we have been back my girlfriend has had to spend another 2 days in hospital. She has had to have her arm re broke and set. The bumpy roads and the journeys to and fro from the airport caused the fractured bones to collapse.
I hope that anyone who reads this does not book with African Safari Club, because they will have you in the bag!
We went to Kenya for a good break, we didn't get the kind of break we expected!!!!!!

AFRICAN SAFARI CLUB........DON'T DO IT!!!