Just a lighthearted topic, try as I might to get the stylish 'european chic' look whist on my hols , I somehow always feel that I REALLY don't get it right, more primark reject ( although I love this shop) than effortless gucci dahling !
Sometimes, I've gone holiday clothes shopping and loved what I've bought and felt really nice in them , only to go on holiday, put them on, go out and feel like a bag lady !
And don't get me started about what I look like on the beach ! blotchy , pale skin, mad sunburn lines, muffin top hanging over my naff ( looked great on the hanger ) bikini, frizzy hair, stubbly legs, oh, my, god, the list is endless !
where's trinny and tranny when you need them ?
Am I alone on this one ?
share your holiday wardrobe disasters with me, make me feel better !
I do try really hard to co-ordinate things and go for some kind of 'total look'. But this can mean just making sure the clothes are similar colours. I do normally manage to tan, but go through quite a few odd colour changes en route.
The last couple of years I have been to Sharm and it is very popular with Italians and the Italian Ladies just seem to look effortlessly glamorous, even when they are trying to cope with a couple of screaming kids. Amazing really. Definately not a good idea to sit next to them at breakfast when your feeling half awake.
I think the worst thing for me is, no matter how hard I try to remain cool, I always end up red in the face, with a lovely sweaty sheen and my hair turns into a frizz ball and that's normally within 5 mins of showering and putting my make up on before I even think about getting dressed.
Fortunately, I do tan easily - thankfully - but im definately of the British variety.
I'm wondering, actually, whether it's the accessories that do it. You know - the right style of sunglasses (mine might be the right style, just at the wrong time and constantly smeared with suntan lotion and slightly wonky cos I haven't invested much in them from a cash point of view), the right jewellry and footwear.
Nope, all of the above reminds me why I will never quite be there. I buy too much cheap stuff.
Also, I tend to be covered in lumps courtesy of the local mozzie population. That isn't chic either. And my nail varnish melts in the heat and looks scabby within hours. And I end up wearing the same footwear every night, with every outfit because they are the 'comfy' ones.
Having said all that anyone wearing full make up on the beach just looks like an idiot. Uber high heels are just not 'holiday' and aren't expensive accessories just a magnet for muggers?
I get so envious on the beach of the gorgeous spanish / italion ladies who don't even drop an ounce of sweat !
They have a tan to die for and accessorise so well !
do our fella's feel the same self consousness as us I wonder when they see bronzed gods in speedo's with a six pack to die for ? lol !
Your post had me laughing out loud. I am also a culprit of buying too much cheap stuff. I should probably buy two or three expensive items each year and just add to them, to get a classier look. After all you can't get much mileage out of a sarong and jewelled flipflops in the UK anyway.
I am facinated by people who manage to wear different earings each day that match the colour of their bikinis, so chic. I am lucky if I remember to take two pairs of earings. Not that I do bikinis anyway as I haven't really got a washboard tummy (more like a washing machine one).
No seen too many bronzed Gods in speedos with six packs to die for where I have been travelling to.
Brilliant thread juby
Thanks for posting this. I was feeling a bit down this morning and it cheered me up no end
Do you think the Italians look at us and thing I wish I looked like them
Its definately the accessories thing . europeans have it all sewn up with their chick handbags ,sunglasses ,scarf /sarong wrapped draped or tied so effortlessly . I would be there all holiday trying to get that look and come nowhere close.
and why is it that my sunbed area always looks like an explosion . Everywhere else I look people have a neat row of sunbeds , items of clothing beautifully pressed and pristine on the table next to them , with the sunlotion bottles in a special little nice clean bag next to clothes pile with a book that looks like its never had a page turned . we seem to have sunbeds all over the place , flip flops scattered that have legs , plates, cups and clothes practically hanging from the umbrella, sun lotion bottles with lids off and a wet book. and Im forever picking up and tidying so I just dont get it .
where's trinny and tranny when you need them
Trinny and susannah are filming here in Chigwell on Tuesday 6th May . they are looking for size 16 + ladies that want to make fools of themselves .
Do you think the Italians look at us and thing I wish I looked like them
not in the slightest Lynn
lynwestie wrote:Trinny and susannah are filming here in Chigwell on Tuesday 6th May . they are looking for size 16 + ladies that want to make fools of themselves .
OMG That has my name written on it. If someone is prepared to give me 2K to spend on clothes, I am perfectly prepared to be humiliated. (most folk have their price and that's mine I think ) I will probably be killed in the crush though. It's even on one of my days off work.
We have a sunbed area problem as well Lyn. All at different angles, normally with a new flipflop having got wedged under the leg of the bed and destroyed on the first day. Naff leaky supermarket branded suncream, rather than posh ambre solaire etc. Looks like a small war zone really.
Apparently according to a Brit in Sharm last year the Italians even manage to go into the Pyramids crawl about inside and then get back on their coaches without a hair out of place. Now that is style.
Me in the daytime - scraped back frizzy hair, red face, stubbly corn beef legs, burnt ears and chest, scratched peacocks sunglasses and water stained beachbag.
Me at night - wild frizzy hair, red melting face, muffin top over my muffin top, and same water stained beachbag. I always manage to have my lipstick on though ....
I always buy too much cheap stuff too. This year I'm going to spend a bit more or one or two tops (Warehouse/River Island) to wear with my Peacocks trousers and Matalan sandals and hopefylly feel a bit better. Also I've had my eye on some seriously blinging flipflops in Faith for ages - I keep visiting them - and I'm debating whether to treat myself for £40 .
If you're at Lykia World this summer, look out for a wild haired, sweaty faced woman with perfectly applied lairy lipstick and diamonte flipflops
Not to mention the chic ritual of running around the sunbathing area chasing after pages from your book because the sun has melted the binding glue. That and the 'hot, hot, hot' dash to the side of the pool for a dip because you couldn't be bothered to retrieve your flip flops from their two separate landing places when you last took them off.
Oh and your towels are always inadequate in some way. Chic ladies have 2 towels, one is hanging up drying off and the other is covering the entirety of the sunbed without leaving any burning hot exposed areas or ever falling down when the bed is in 'sitting up' position. You, however, have only one towel, which looked bigger in the shop, is always bunching up, flopping down if you move the bed position in any way, has a big wet patch in the shape of your backside and is still a bit crunchy from taking it down to the beach and not washing it out afterwards. And the suntan lotion lid wasn't closed properly so there's a yellowish stain on it too from spillage.
Chic ladies sip ice cold gin and tonic from a nice glass. We drink lager from a pint tankard which has greasy fingerprints all over it and leaves the table covered in wet rings. Chic ladies don't eat at their sunbeds, they take their saronged selves (always with a dry bikini on) off to a nice bar/cafe to eat. We scoff a large packet of cheesy wotsit type foreign crisps whilst perched on our sunbeds.
Chic ladies have random blokes offering to adjust their sunshade for them and if they require to be in shade their entire body will be in shade. We wrestle with the umbrella, spending some time trapped inside the mechanism, jumping up to inch it a bit this way, then that way (this requires bending over to drag the sand filled bottom along the floor, which gives other holidaymakers a nice view of our backsides) before ending up with either whole head or from knees down still being blasted by the sun. Random blokes watch from the bar whilst laughing into their beers at the 'she just has to be british' bint struggling with her area.
Oh and chic ladies never have to retrieve their swimwear from up their backsides after jumping in the pool, or will ever find themselves involuntarily topless from the same activity. Ever.
My worst holiday clothes faux pas was that i bought a long white gypsy skirt from primark one year and was wearing it down to dinner thinking i looked ok - it was not until we were walking into the restaurant that my husband turned round and said "by the way did you realise that your pants are visible through that skirt?" Er no dear i didnt but thanks for just pointing it out NOW!!
Another thing we saw that doesnt really do us brits many favours was a woman who for 10 days wore the same white england bikini day in/day out and it was looking quite grubby by the end of her holiday - at least i do take more than one bikini to wear and wash them!!
I am also the one who usually has a inflatable whale/shark/boat attached to my sunbed to stop it blowing away and it is also me who has to run after said whale/shark/boat when it does get blown away unfortunatly NOT running like pamela anderson in baywatch....
You just would never see them making a fool of themselves by not being able to get onto a lilo even with the help of every child in there.
i once went on holiday with my h2b to spain and was paddling in the sea. a freak wave came and washed me back up the beach( beached whale definately would have described the scene) i tried to stand up and regain my composure and dignity only to realise that sand was weighing down my bikini top and bottoms...i looked like id had a really bad "accident" if you know what i mean..it was definately a bridget jones moment...my h2b couldnt stop laughing....imagine that..wasnt that funny!!!! needles to say i hid under the parasol for the rest of the day xxxxxxx
Every british lady in the land can identify with what we've all said !
But hey, girls, we actually look like we are enjoying ourselves which i've rarely seen with 'the euro chic chick' .
Each holiday time comes around and I do one day of abdominal crunches 6 weeks before, then say to myself 'there must be someone there who looks worse than me '.
Another annoying thing about the spanish/italian ladies on the beach, how come they don't have a grain of sand on them even though they're on a towel or beach mat ?
I always end up with it in places I never thought was possible !
How come I always end up exfoliating by mistake when rubbing my lotion in because I have handfuls of sand ?
Its all a mystery ............
Post a Reply
Please sign in or register an account to reply to this post.