ellie, sorry only just caught up with this. I am so sorry about your friends husband

As for your husband then words fail me. I do hope that he will be okay. They should of had him in hospital a way long time ago!

Glad he has a bed now. I would ring up the private consultants PA tell them he has been addmitted and say you want to tempoporarily cancel the appointment pending what happens in the hospital.

chris ive just cancelled appointment. hospital totally useless, just rang them and everything i asked she just said i dont know, even down to asking is he in pain, im now starting to get angrier and angrier the more i think about things inc the drs and i feel like going up there and having a word, but doubt it will get me anywhere, this is the worse treatment i have had in my life with the nhs. all i got out of her is he needs another scan , and visiting is 2.30 to 7, i asked if ellie could go and again i dont know, turn up and see if they let her in, what sort of stupid comment is that, drive 4 miles to the hospital for them to say no, that would really stress her out, if they dont allow her in, , totally peed off with it all , just want some answers

It's disgusting the way you are being treated,I would ring the ward again and ask to speak to the staff nurse or his alloted nurse ,hopefully you will get better answers.I would tell them that you will keep ringing until you speak to someone who cares.Thinking of you and your hubby,wishing him well,T.

Have you got any close family or friends to call on? You could do with a bit of looking after at the moment.
You could ask them to ring up to find out how Oz is.
You know everyone is thinking of you both.
Please try to relax a little - you will be seeing Oz later - please give him a big kiss from all of us!

Most hospitals allow at least two at visiting time. I dont think they will care if it is two adults or an adult and a child. I dont know you of course and this may not be your style but perhaps it wouldn't hurt to be a bit angry when you do talk to them, I know I shouldn't say this but you might get more of a result if they see how you feel.

I'm not saying take it out on any individuals staff members as such as you dont want to alienate anyone, but just be a bit assertive, seems like you have been passed from pillar to post for long enough and could really do with some answers at to what is wrong with him.

Thinking of you all and hoping you get some answers. With the regards to is it his appendix or bowel matter, something similar happened to my son a couple of years ago. He was admitted with suspected grumbling appendicitis after having pain on and off for almost 2 years. As he was getting ready for surgery we were told not to be surprised if they'd have to remove part of his bowel too. He had to sign a consent form for this. It was a really worrying time and I remember coming home in floods of tears. Glad to report that it turned out to be a straight forward appendectomy although they said that it was so inflammed it was about to burst.

Best of luck Ellie-Meg.

well ive just been up to the drs and spoken to the duty nurse and office manager, they said that he obviously wasnt acute the previous times hence not being admitted before now and that if he had been so bad over the weekend i should have called the out of hours dr ,i feel thats putting the blame on me somewhat grrr, they also said cos i wasnt at all dr appointments that my hubby could have played the pain down a bit, which i dont know until i speak to him later . she also said if the hospital dont think its acute and his pain relief is sorted he might be sent home as an out patient omg hope that doesnt happen, they also said hospital wont give any patient information out over the phone even to the drs ,thats why they wouldnt tell me anything . they did say i could ask lots of questions , if they do decide to let him go ,saying i couldnt cope with him if the pain gets worse etc and what exactly are they going to do next etc, im going to ring hospital again in half hour to decide whether to take ellie or not, depending on how he is , thanks for all this support.

i dont have much family around parents live abroad, my oldest daughter is 35 weeks pregnant and ozs parents live nearby but shes recovering from an operation she had on thurs grrr, son lives 20 miles away and is working full time

Karen I'm assuming you are at the hospital now but so you know most wards now seem to have a resident doctor overseeing the patients . He will be behind one of those closed doors if they have one and nobody will tell you unless you ask . Dont know what the official term for them is .

I know they give you these visiting times but if ever any of my close family i.e parents are in hospital I go at any time I like despite what the visiting hours are and they always let me in . Theres always plenty of others in there too . Dont ask over the phone,they will just give you the visiting hours, just go , press the buzzer and say you are oz's wife and walk straight in . The ward should be quite sympathic to you wanting to be there during a ward round by the doctor which are normally in the mornings and would not discourage you from being there .

Get your fighting gloves on girl and as Chris suggests be assertive . Not easy I know but it's surprising how good I can be at it when pushed and angry. I can't see that they would release him this quick . Crikey anybody I know that has been taken into hospital literally has to beg to get out . Once you are in that bed theres no getting away and the wheels move slowly .

lyn x

Ellie Meg - you need to make an appointment with the DR who is treating OZ. They don't like visitors being there when its the DR's rounds though, and you will often be asked to leave. No one will give you information over the phone either, as you could be anybody. If they decide to send him home I would tell hubyy to say he is not moving out of the bed until he knows what's wrong.

They don't like visitors being there when its the DR's rounds though, and you will often be asked to leave

I guess it depends on what type of ward it is Helen or hospital policies as some are stricter than others but when my elderly parents have been in hospital I am normally asked to try and be there at the time the dr visits.

If they decide to send him home I would tell hubyy to say he is not moving out of the bed until he knows what's wrong

Definately

lyn

just got back from hospital been there 4 hrs his parents have taken over lol. i spoke to the dr , he needs to have a ct scan but today was too busy so they have assured me he will get one tom, once this is done it might shed more light on whats going on with his bowels, if it shows nothing up then they will do more tests , hes on various medication and liquid morphine at the moment. they also suspect he has mumps on top of all his other problems grr, so they will also now be checking this out on the scan the dr promised me he wont let him go until hes found out whats wrong , he might have to have a biopsy done on his bowel. they also said hes not in the high age risk for bowel cancer and doubts its that ,which is obviously what you first think of , he suspects its the aftermath of the problem he picked up in turkey, fingers crossed they find out whats wrong soon

Well it sounds like they are on the right tracks now to finding out what's wrong - and he should be feeling a bit more comfortable with the pain relief he's getting. Mumps?? - oh dear that can make adults feel really awful without the additional troubles he's having - poor soul he must be feeling dreadful!
You will be relieved to hear they aren't going to discharge him until they find out what's wrong - and about time too!!
Look after yourself too!!

sounds more promising Karen at least in terms of oz getting some form of diagnosis . No doubt you will still be worried until you know what it is but at least someone is listening to you now and that must be a huge relief .

How are you feeling . ? Drained , exhausted and worried sick no doubt . You must try and get some sleep and some food down you .

We are all here for you karen and will be staying with you all the way .

take care
lyn x

thanks thats really kind of you all, yes im drained, upset, peed off and had a migraine half of the day grr, stress and lack of sleep i assume .

at least he has his mob charger now so he can contact me, hes going to ask if i can go to visit in the daytime.

tomorrow was Darrens birthday so we were going out with all sues family to celebrate his life, ill still go though incase i cant make the funeral next week, gosh when it rains it pours in my house

Stay strong Ellie we are all with you and thinking of you .

Sleep well, Ellie. You can do nothing more. At least you both are in a better place than last night! x

Glad things are beginning to sort themselves out for him. Just to answer some of the posts, it all depends on the ward itself and how strict e.t.c the visiting times are e.t.c. On my ward we do not allow visitors in during ward rounds unless there are mitigating circumstances (confused patient) e.t.c however the next of kin for that particular patient is able to make an appointment with the doctor, aslong as the patient has given consent. Many relatives think that they are entitled to know what's going on before the patient. We have had many relatives saying tell me the diagnosis but don't tell mum/dad e.t.c. They don't realize that this is ethically incorrect (not talking about your situation ellie-meg). We do allow patients to have daytime visitors however aslong as they are able to go and sit in the dayroom. Also it is correct in what they say about being unable to give information out over the phone. We can only tell relatives simple info like they're comfortable, but no results e.t.c. Hopefully things will get sorted pretty quick for him now Ellie-meg. Good luck

Hope you have a decent nights rest Karen, at least it sounds like you will finally get to find out what is wrong and hopefully the correct treatment. Cant beleive he has got mumps as well what bad luck.